Teacher's Lunch Contest, 3rd Round

by Winners and Finalists

All poems are the property of the authors, used by permission here. Any copying or use of a poem without the author’s consent is unlawful.

Third Round Winner

Teacher’s Last Lunch
Chicken lips and lizard hips
And alligator eyes.
Monkey legs with catfish eggs
And salamander thighs.
Rabbit ears and camel rears
And tasty toenail pies.
Stir them all together,
it’s the teacher’s soup surprise.
—Nupur Mathur, 5th grade

Third Round Finalists

Lunch for Teacher
If I served hot lunch to my teacher,
I’d start off with wiggly worm stew.
Then I would serve her a chocolate milkshake
With a generous dash of glue.
Next I would serve her tossed salads
With plenty of jumping beans.
She’ll jump from the lunchroom to the playground.
I hope she’s wearing her jeans.
—Caitlin Wilson, 4th grade

The Stuff I Served My Teacher
The stuff I served my teacher
was pretty, fairly gross!
Like rotten eggs and lumpy milk
and burned up purple toast.
She gave me too much homework
so I hope she gets sick
when she eats some roasted apples
with spinach flavored dip.
Porridge with bananas
and it might even have moss
And also rumor has it
that it has Tabasco sauce.
So when she eats all of this junk
I hope that she’ll get better.
We’ll have no homework for six months
Because I will never let her!
—Amanda Machado, 6th grade

Lunch for My Teacher
If I served my teacher lunch
It would be so fun to munch.
It would be…
sewer soup,
dog poop,
lizard guts,
monkey butts,
maggot macaroni,
(I think she’s a phony),
a blood shake
and cockroach cake,
maybe a mud pie.
I hope she doesn’t cry!
—Katie Taylor, 6th grade

Teacher’s Lunch
If I served hot lunch to my teacher
I’d start off with ground cat eye stew
then a plate of toe jam oysters
and a tall glass of cow snot, too!
A platter of grilled maggot patties
and a large slice of chocolate fly-pie.
When my teacher finds out what she ate
I really hope she does not die.
—Jonathan Paul Hayes, 6th grade

The Perfect Lunch
I promised my teacher the perfect lunch
One she’d never forget.
First I’d start with a French Eyeball Soup
Then maybe some earwax bread to get set.
Then for the Main Course Supreme
Some Lizard Gut Shepherd’s Pie.
Dessert is a worm cake covered with bees.
It’s the perfect lunch—I won’t lie.
—Laura Jane Alexandra Green, 5th grade

What I’d Serve MY Teacher for Lunch
If my teacher would eat whatever I made,
I’d start with some crabapple juice,
I’d mix it up good with some rotten skunk fumes,
and tell her ’m calling a truce.
Then the main course would be fried worm soup,
with a little cockroach fried rice.
And a plate with a monkey brain sandwich
would seem to her awfully nice.
Dessert would then be a fly pie
with some maggot topped whipped cream.
Call an ambulance, please hurry,
this is the worst tummy ache you’ve ever seen!!!
—Larissa Collum, 6th grade

A Lunch for My Teacher
Sloppy bugs
Slimy slugs
Weed medallions
Over-cooked scallions
A brown bear’s appendix
Moldy liver sticks
Mashed worm guts
Band-Aids from bloody cuts
Ladybug spit
All piled on a sweaty catcher’s mitt
If I have my way
She’ll need a sick day!
—Nicole Zawislan, 2nd grade


go back to Readem Ratem