Maximess
 
 


by David Fisher
 
   

My little brother is one and a half
And I know there's trouble when I hear him laugh
Our parents keep cleaning but it's too big a job
Cause my brother MAX....Is the world's biggest slob


NO MESS MAX! NO MAS MAX! Mi madre would say
NO MESS MAX! NO MAS MAX! Please put that away!
NO MESS MAX! NO MAS MAX! Let's wipe off your face
NO MESS MAX! NO MAS MAX! Just look at this place!


Dad and I have this puzzle we've worked on for years
One by one Max threw every piece down the stairs
Then the tooth fairy came and Max had to spoil it
With his new favorite game...flush the bill down the toilet
He tosses his blankets each night from his crib
His eating's creative thinking "outside the bib"
I'm willing to bet he...could make most parents faint
Max works in spaghetti...like Pollock in paint


NO MESS MAX! NO MAS MAX! Mi madre would say
NO MESS MAX! NO MAS MAX! Please put that away!
NO MESS MAX! NO MAS MAX! Let's wipe off your face
NO MESS MAX! NO MAS MAX! Just look at this place!


Pancakes are tricky
'Cause toppings are sticky
The same goes for blintzes and crepes
Face and hands never rinsed, he's the prince of making prints
And his napkin's the couch or the drapes


NO MESS MAX! NO MAS MAX! Mi madre would say
NO MESS MAX! NO MAS MAX! Please put that away!
NO MESS MAX! NO MAS MAX! Let's wipe off your face
NO MESS MAX! NO MAS MAX! Just look at this place!


Turn your back in a flash he can transform a room
'Cause he'll ransack the trash like a hungry raccoon
Even pro diaper changers have all been outplayed
Drop your guard for a moment and you will be sprayed
Paper towels or tissues he'll shred all he'll touch
Even with all his issues we love him so much
His full name's Max i mess, he's the runt in his litter
Mom and Dad need a rest, maybe you know a sitter?



Text © David Fisher reprinted from Fish And Chips. Any copying or use of this poem without consent is unlawful.

 
 
 
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