Mystery Meal

by Bruce Lansky
(Sing to the tune of “The Old Gray Mare”)

Great green globs of
greasy, grimy gopher guts,
mutilated monkey meat,
little birdies’ dirty feet.
Hot school lunches
aren’t fit for kids to eat.
So pass the ketchup, please.

Pizza topped with
rotten eggs and sauerkraut,
seven-week-old speckled trout.
Toss it at your friends and shout.
Start a food fight—
you’ll get caught, without a doubt.
So pass the pepper, please.

Text © Bruce Lansky reprinted from I've Been Burping in the Classroom, published by Meadowbrook Press. Illustration © Stephen Carpenter. Any copying or use of this poem or illustration without consent is unlawful.

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