My Locker is Obscene

by Kathy Kenney-Marshall
(Sing to the tune of “America: My Country ’Tis of Thee”)

My locker is obscene—
worst place you’ve ever seen.
It’s such a mess.
Place where old math tests lie,
old lunch, old apple pie.
The janitor will surely die
when I leave in June.

I’ll clean it right away.
I’ll throw this stuff away,
like ham and cheese,
bologna green with mold,
thick milk that’s four months old,
five chocolate bars I never sold.
I should clean this soon.

I’ll start with last month’s fruit,
my First Communion suit
from second grade,
three coats, four pairs of shoes,
eight books I’ll never use,
pink globs of gum with two more chews,
and an old balloon.

I’m almost halfway through.
Don’t know just what to do
with all these ants.
They’re crawling everywhere.
Millions are here, I swear.
They’re even in old underwear
that I lost last fall.

I think I’m almost done.
I’m sure there’s only one
more pile to go.
Five T-shirts almost clean,
my bag from Halloween,
and finally one jellybean.
Whew! I’ve done it all!

Text © Kathy Kenney-Marshall reprinted from I’ve Been Burping in the Classroom, published by Meadowbrook Press. Illustration © Stephen Carpenter. Any copying or use of this poem or illustration without consent is unlawful.

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