My Locker Is Obscene

by Kathy Kenny-Marshall

(sing to the tune of “My Country Tis of Thee”)

My locker is obscene&mdash
worse place you’ve ever seen.
It’s such a mess.
Place where old math tests lie,
old lunch, old apple pie.
The janitor will surely die,
when I leave in June.

I’ll clean it right away.
I’ll throw this stuff away,
like ham and cheese,
baloney green with mold,
thick milk that’s four months old,
five chocolate bars I never sold.
I should clean this soon.

I’ll start with last month’s fruit,
My First Communion suit
from second grade,
three coats, four pairs of shoes,
eight books I’ll never use,
pink globs of gum with two more chews,
and an old balloon.

I’m almost halfway through.
Don’t know just what to do
with all these ants.
They’re crawling everywhere.
There’s millions here, I swear.
They’re even in old underwear
that I lost last fall.

I think I’m almost done.
I’m sure there’s only one
more pile to go.
Five T-shirts almost clean,
my bag from Halloween,
and finally one jellybean.
Whew! I’ve done it all!


Text © Kathy Kenny-Marshall, reprinted from My Teacher’s in Detention, forthcoming from Meadowbrook Press. Illustration © Stephen Carpenter. Any copying or use of this poem or illustration without consent is unlawful.

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